You're standing there with teardrops almost flowing
You look like a little girl that I once saw
Who bought a peppermint stick down at the drugstore
And stopped to pet a big ol' friendly dog

Who licked the red off of your candy
Who's the dirty dog I'm sticking on
Who licked the red off of your candy
And melted all the honey off of our love

Well I hope you don't think I'm being snooping
And I hope you don't consider me uncouth
But it seems to me your lower lip is drooping
Much lower than a lower lip should droop

Who licked the red off of your candy
Who would do such a terrible, low-down trick
Who licked the red off of your candy
And left you standing there with an empty stick

You standing there a fretting and a pouting
You look like you just lost your best friend
Your face reminds me of my little sister
When she tried to hang her balloon on a safety pin

Who licked the red off of your candy
Who's the dirty dog who'd go that far
Who licked the red off of your candy
And melted all the chocolate off of my heart