Southern Air, Southern Air
If you're flying down to Dixie
You won't find a cheaper fare
Southern Air, Southern Air
Yeah, we'll treat you like kinfolks
But you better have time to spare

Yeah, there I was. I'd just stepped on board flight
78492100976 5432 82765...7. Flying non stop from
Hahira, Georgia to Yazoo City, Mississippi. Done
bought me one of them triple ultra super saver center
seat tickets. Set down there between a duck and a
Leadbetter. Fella tried to talk to me, couldn't
understand a word he was sayin', he sounded like
a log truck. Duck didn't say nothin'. All of a
sudden I hear this voice comin' in over the intracom...

This here is Capt. Jerry Clower. Whooo! I wanta
welcome all y'all to Southern Air. We'll be ready
for takeoff shortly, just as soon as they clear
the runway. (Mooo...)

There was a gun rack in the cockpit
It beat all I'd ever seen
They had complimentary copies
Of Mechanics Magazine
We peeled rubber on the runway
Looking out my window screen
I saw an "Eat more possum" bumper sticker
Stuck out on the wing

Southern Air, Southern Air
Flying high over Dixie
Going where no others dare
Southern Air, we're Southern Air
Yeah, we'll take you to your kinfolks
But you better have time to spare

Yeah, there I was. Must have been 500 feet over them
pine trees. Duck had done fainted on takeoff. Had his
little head layin' on my arm there, his little tongue
just all hangin' out. We flew past Stone Mountain,
crossed that Alabama state line, got so close to
Enterprise you could almost see that Boll Weevil
monument. This I heard this sharp ringin' in my ear...

Howw Deee! My name is Miss Pearl and I'll be your
stewardess for the duration of this flight. As you
can see Captain Clower has turned off the NO CHEWIN
sign. Now y'all feel free to kick your shoes off,
get up, roam around, get to know your neighbors.
Right now I just want to get to know this good
looking, handsome young hunk of man right cheer...

She served Nehi's, Moon Pies
And bowls of butter beans
Gone with the Wind was skippin'
On that movie screen
While Marcelle, Claudelle, Raynell, Eunell
Clovis and Eugene
We're all taking turns at the churn
Turnin' out peach ice cream

Southern Air, we're Southern Air
Flying high over Dixie
Country comforts in the air
Southern Air, Southern Air
If you're dyin' to see your kinfolks
Well you better have time to spare

Yeah, there I was. That Miss Pearl was givin' me
more attention then she did that first class
passenger. Kept showin' me all the new safety tips
and playin' with my seatbelt. Got me so nervous I
dropped my last piece of pecan pie right on that
duck's head. That little feller come to and jumped
up a-quacking and a-squallin', didn't know where
he was. Started runnin' up and down the aisle,
tripped over the ice cream freezer, stepped in
Marcelle's sweet potatoes and flew out the screen
door and was gone! Nuthin' but feathers. Then I
heard that voice again comin' in over the intracom...

I can see Yazoo City from HEAH! Whoo! Now don't
y'all fret about that landin' none, I got up early
this mornin' and put on a brand new set of them big
foot MUD gripper tires.

Through rain or shine, we stayed behind
Lord, it was quite a show
How that duck beat us to Yazoo
Well, I guess I'll never know
And that broody girl they called Miss Pearl
Just wouldn't let me go
While that Captain kept on talkin'
On his 2-way radio

Southern Air, Southern Air
Uncle Mercy! Can you get them cows off the runway?
(Mooo...)
Southern Air, we're Southern Air
You good looking thing, you!
Did anybody ever tell you you'd be real cute
if you'd just get a haircut?
Southern Air, we're Southern Air
Now cut that out, stop that! Well, I never!
What kind of holding pattern is this?
Southern Air, we're Southern Air
If you're running from your kinfolks
Well, we've got one-way fares, Southern Air!