If you've been better than I've been you've been bored
I've been like a ship that never left the shore
I've got lots of loving left in use for years and years or more
If you've been better than I've been you've been bored

As I walked out for work today, my wife told me goodbye
She smiled her silly smile and said "Be good"
Sarcastically I said to her but only in my mind
"Maybe I'd be bad if I could"

But in this town word spreads around just like a house on fire
She'd find out if ever I were bad
You could've been better than I've been if you've never had desires
But if you've been better than I've been you've been bored

If you've been better than I've been you've been bored
I've been like a ship that never left the shore
I've got lots of loving left in use for years and years or more
And if you've been better than I've been you've been bored

I've had romantic 'ventures with the women all the time
And many are the pleasures I have had
The trouble is the fun an games are only in my mind
I'm scared to take a chance on being bad

If you've been better than I've been you've been bored
I've been like a ship that never left the shore
I've got lots of loving left in use for years and years or more
If you've been better than I've been you've been bored

If you've been better than I've been you've been bored