Sides face grand square
We took the legs from some old table
We took the arms from some old chair
And for a neck we used a bottle
And from a horse we took some hair
Four ladies promenade go one time around
You gotta get back home and swing
Left allemande and promenade the ring
We got more lovin' from the gosh darn dummy
Than we ever got from you

Here's where the heads promenade go about halfway round
Down the middle and square thru go four hands around
Four hands and then a right & left thru you know
You're gonna veer to the left the couples circulate one time
Girls trade, boys run around this girl, boys trade twice
Swing that corner promenade that ring
Well we got more lovin' from that gosh darn dummy
Than we ever got from you