Sides face grand square
When I was a kid, I'd take a little trip
Every summer down the Mississip
And one day I caught me a squirrel
I stuffed him in an old shoe box
Punched a couple holes in the top
And Sunday, I snuck him into church
Four ladies promenade, once around I said
Come back home and swing and promenade her
The day my squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In the sleepy little town of Paskabula

Head two couples square thru four hands around you do
Make a right hand star now when you meet the outsides
Heads star left in the middle and turn it full around
Same two go right & left thru and turn 'em
Swing thru and then, swing thru again
Swing that corner, promenade
The day my squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In the sleepy little town of Paskabula

Sides face, grand square
Well the squirrel got loose and ran down the aisle
Just as the choir sang "I surrender all"
And ran up in Harv Newman's coveralls
Harv leaped to his feet and he danced and he screamed
"Somethin's gotta hold on me -- YOWL!"
Four ladies promenade, once around I said
Come back home and swing, promenade her
He thought he had a weed-eater loose
In his Fruit of the Looms
In the sleepy little town of Paskabula

Sides face grand square
Well the squirrel ran out of his britches
To the other side of the room
Way down to the A-men pew
Where sat sister Bertha "Better-than-you"
And she jumped to her feet and yelled
"Lord have mercy on me"
Four ladies promenade, once around I said
Come back home and swing, promenade her
As the squirrel made laps inside her dress
She began to cry and then to confess
In the sleepy little town of Paskabula