Sides face grand square
Well, when I was a kid I'd take a trip every summer down the Mississipp'
To visit my granny in her antebellum world
I'd run barefooted all day long climbin' trees free as a song
And one day I happened to catch myself a squirrel
Allemande and weave
Well, I stuffed him down in an old shoe box, punched a couple of holes in the top
And when Sunday came I snuck him into church
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In the sleepy little town of Pascagoula

Head two couples square thru four hands around you do
Make a right hand star now when you meet the outsides
Heads star left in the middle and turn it full around
Same two go right & left thru and turn 'em
Swing thru and then, swing thru again
Swing that corner, promenade
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They were jumpin' pews and shoutin' Hallelujah

Sides face grand square
Well the squirrel got loose and ran down the aisle
Just as the choir sang "I surrender all"
And ran up in Harv Newman's coveralls
Harv leaped to his feet and he danced and he screamed
"Somethin's gotta hold on me, Allemande and weave
Well, Harv hit the aisles dancin' and screamin'
Some thought he had religion, others thought he had a demon
And Harv thought he had a weed-eater loose in his Fruit-Of-The-Looms
The day the squirrel went berserk In the First Self-Righteous Church
In the sleepy little town of Pascagoula

Sides face grand square
Well the squirrel ran out of his britches
To the other side of the room
Way down to the A-men pew
Where sat sister Bertha "Better-than-you"
As the squirrel jumped her garters and crossed down to her knees
she jumped to her feet and yelled
"Lord have mercy on me", Allemande left and weave
As the squirrel made laps inside her dress
She began to cry and then to confess to sins that would make a sailor blush with shame
The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous Church
In the sleepy little town of Pascagoula